Joe

I grew up on Long Island, in a middle to upper-middle-class suburb, in a very typical American way. If you picture what growing up in the American suburbs looks like, my childhood probably fits that image pretty closely. Whenever friends from other countries visit, they tell me it looks just like the movies.

I was shy, and I grew up with a twin sister, so people often saw us as opposites. She went to sleepaway camp in upstate New York every summer. I was always too scared. I did go to camp once, but it was a baseball camp, and I went with a friend. I was much less inclined to step outside my comfort zone.

It’s funny to think about now, because I’m a very different person today. That confidence didn’t develop overnight. College helped me become more independent, and a six-week study abroad in Argentina pushed me further. Looking back, those experiences laid the foundation for someone who would go on to spend years living and working in other countries.

As a kid, I believed life followed a specific trajectory. I loved cars, and I imagined that by 18 I’d be driving a nice one. Then would come marriage and whatever else followed, all in sequential order. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized everyone’s path is different, and there’s no way to predict the experiences that will shape us or where we’ll end up. I certainly never imagined I’d spend seven and a half years teaching English in three different countries before becoming an architect. It’s the unexpected experiences, and the paths we never planned to take, that shape who we become.

For me, college was a journey of self-discovery. In high school, most of us are so busy trying to fit in that we don’t take the time to figure out who we are or what genuinely interests us. College gave me room to explore what I was curious about. I entered undeclared, with no idea what I wanted to study. Freshman year, I took a variety of classes before finding my way into geography, with a minor in art history.

I was drawn to geography because I wanted to study something related to the environment, but I wasn’t interested in the sciences, so engineering and environmental science were already ruled out. Then I took a cultural geography class that introduced me to ways of understanding the world I’d never been exposed to. It challenged how I saw people, places, and the relationships between them.

Around the same time, I took a class called Architecture in Global Context, and it opened up an entirely different world. For the first time, I seriously considered studying architecture. But it would have meant transferring schools, and at 18, that felt like too big a decision. So I stayed with geography and minored in art history, partly because it let me take architectural history classes and partly because I’d always loved art.

As for my first “real” job, that depends on how you define one. Shortly after graduating, I moved to Costa Rica, where I taught English, earned maybe $450 a month, and lived with other English teachers. I wanted to do something different. Throughout my geography studies, so much of what I learned centered on understanding people, places, and cultures. I’d spent years studying the world in classrooms, and now I wanted to experience it for myself.

My plan was to teach for a year, travel a little, and maybe return to graduate school. Geography wasn’t exactly a degree with a clearly defined career path, so I wasn’t sure what came next. But one year turned into several, and what was supposed to be temporary became a significant chapter of my life. I wouldn’t change it. If I hadn’t studied geography, taken those classes, or moved abroad, I don’t think I’d be where I am today.

People often wonder how I went from teaching English to architecture, but the answer goes all the way back to that freshman class. Throughout my years abroad, architecture stayed a constant interest. In Europe, I was fascinated by the architectural heritage of the places I visited. I lived in Andalusia, Spain, surrounded by the layers of Moorish and Christian architecture that have shaped the region for centuries. When I lived in South Korea, the first country I visited on vacation was Cambodia, specifically to see Angkor Wat, a monument I’d first learned about in that architecture class years earlier. Wherever I traveled, I found myself paying attention to the built environment, whether a centuries-old monument or an ordinary neighborhood street.

After South Korea, I planned to travel around Southeast Asia and then make my way to Australia on a working holiday visa. Then COVID happened, and those plans disappeared. With travel off the table, I started thinking about what I wanted to do next. Around then, I realized how much I enjoyed looking at houses and buildings on my runs. Architecture had always been there in the background, but I hadn’t seriously considered it since freshman year.

One day, I Googled, “Is 30 too old to study architecture?” I found a Reddit thread where people overwhelmingly said no. That was enough to make me seriously consider it, and eventually I went for it. From 2021 to 2024, I spent three and a half years earning my Master of Architecture at Virginia Tech, and today I’m a licensed architect. Something I’d considered at 18 became my career more than a decade later.

A lot of people don’t know what architects actually do, and whatever they think they know is probably quite different from the reality. One of the most challenging parts is the sheer breadth of knowledge you’re expected to have. Architecture isn’t just designing beautiful buildings. You need to understand enough structural, mechanical, and electrical engineering to coordinate with those disciplines and make sure everything works together. You need an in-depth understanding of building science, construction methods, and building codes. On top of that, architects often act as project managers, coordinating clients, engineers, contractors, and consultants so a project moves forward and is built according to the design. There are countless other responsibilities I’m probably forgetting, and that’s part of what makes the profession both challenging and interesting. You’re constantly learning, problem-solving, and balancing priorities, often in ways people outside the profession never see.

I believe we only have one life and should make the most of it. I recognize that not everyone has the means to travel, but I think the world would be a better place if more people could experience how others live and witness the beauty of our planet. Stepping outside your familiar surroundings and seeing the world from a different perspective can fundamentally change how you understand it.

Maybe it’s because I recently watched a documentary about climbing K2 and then went down a rabbit hole of mountaineering videos, but I’ve been thinking about what it means to truly experience life. When climbers make their way up a mountain, they’re completely immersed. Nothing matters beyond the challenge in front of them. There’s something powerful about that kind of presence, where the distractions of everyday life fall away. The responsibilities of daily life mean we can’t always live that way. But if we could find more opportunities for that sense of presence, through travel, adventure, or simply stepping outside our routines, we might come away with a greater appreciation for life and perhaps for one another.

I like habits, and I try to make them positive ones. I don’t use my phone or other electronics in bed, and I try to run or work out in the morning. Unfortunately, my phone has been slowly creeping into more of my daily life, and it’s a difficult habit to break. Speaking of phones, I refuse to spend money on new electronics unnecessarily. I’ll use an iPhone for as long as reasonably possible, or until Verizon offers a trade-in deal good enough to get a new one essentially free. The same goes for headphones. When I do need to replace them, I won’t buy whatever’s most popular. I’ll spend far too much time researching which ones offer the best sound for the price. I can’t stand the idea of having something like Alexa in my apartment. Technology already occupies too much of our attention, and I don’t want to invite more of it into my home.

Art is different. Saying I’ll buy it without hesitation isn’t entirely accurate, because affordability still matters, but if I had a lot more money, I’d have a lot more art, and every piece would be professionally framed. I have a backlog of artwork waiting to be framed, and framing is surprisingly expensive. Still, I think a beautifully framed piece is something everyone should have at home. The frame is often overlooked, even though it can completely change how a piece is experienced. Next time you’re at a museum, look at the frames instead of just the artwork. It’s amazing how much variety there is, and how much craftsmanship goes into something most people barely notice.

There’s one thing I keep coming back to, because it feels like what’s missing. I’ve been fortunate to have had so many different experiences, and I think there’s something important about finding ways to give back. I’d like to contribute more to the community around me, rather than simply being someone who lives there. It’s easy to get caught up in routines, responsibilities, and interests, and before you know it, months or years have passed without making time for something you genuinely wanted to do. If I didn’t have to work, I’d dedicate a lot more time to volunteering. I don’t need to stop working to make that happen, but finding the time and following through is something I’m still working on.

“Have awareness outside oneself.”
— Joe

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